Unconscious Motivations

One of the central things that trips up not just leaders in their ability to lead, but all of us in our lives, is unconscious motivations.

Unconscious motivations prevent us from having choice – and freedom.

They run the show. Even when it’s a show we wouldn’t buy tickets to.

I’m going to use an example that most people have experienced or seen.

Unrequited love. This can be friendship or romantic. Or even a workplace dynamic.

If you come into a relationship needing to be loved and needed, it’s likely things will go wonky on some level.

It’s not that those aren’t real needs. They are.

Problem is we’ve been taught to fulfill them outside of ourselves. We’ve been taught that what counts is how many people love us. That tells us our worth and value – or so we’ve been told.

It’s no wonder then that we’re working so hard to get others to love us.

We’re stuck in a cycle of giving our power away. Of dimming ourselves to try to belong. Even of unwittingly manipulating others, pretzelling ourselves to get that love. That value and validation.

We get into relationships to be needed – hoping that will lead to people loving us.

It’s why we stay stuck in poor quality relationships and why we can’t take good relationships to great.

It has big costs for leaders trying to build other leaders. Instead of being able to inspire, they’re stuck in dynamics that are limited in their effectiveness.

They know something’s off. They feel the frustration. Dissatisfaction. Even heartache.

Yet they can’t put their finger on what’s wrong or how to fix it.

#LeadershipDevelopment #Awareness #ConsciousLeadership #PersonalDevelopment #ServantLeader #EmotionalIntelligence #Consciousness #Transformation #Burnout #MentalHealth #Happiness #Empowerment #ThinkingDifferently #ForceforGood #Anxiety #stress #InspirationalLeadership

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