The Fear of Emotions

Why do we fear our emotions?

Experiencing anger, anxiety, jealousy, and other “negative” feelings can be hard.

Many just don’t do it because they’re afraid.

We’ve been taught that so-called negative emotions are ‘not OK.’

That they’re not valid. That we’re bad people for having them.

That there’s no real way to address them.

We don’t have a lot of role models for emotions. Often our caregivers ignored or dismissed their own emotions or didn’t express them in healthy, responsible ways. So you learned to dismiss and ignore your emotions.

Our responses – putting others’ needs before our own, throwing ourselves into busy work or social lives, downing some glasses of wine to take the ‘edge’ off – means we don’t get a lot of practice in feeling our feelings.

It’s easy to fear that you might not be able to tolerate those negative feelings. That you’ll fall apart. Or that it will be like a volcano exploding.

We’re also scared of negative feelings because as a society we see these emotions as weak.

We think, ‘how embarrassing’ rather than “how brave.”

Especially in the workplace.

In our society, we worship happiness. We prefer to pretend that everything is ok, gloss over any bits that aren’t. That’s what we’ve been told is strength.

But vulnerability is strength.

When we acknowledge and validate our feelings, we empower ourselves. We develop self-trust. Integrity.


We learn that we’ll be ok. That we’ll have the resources to handle the difficult bits.

#LeadershipDevelopment #PersonalDevelopment #EmotionalIntelligence #Wellbeing #Transformation #BurnoutPrevention #Burnout #Resilience #MentalHealth #Happiness #Empowerment

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